Musings on Marriage

Recalling and Loving the Small Details – Marriage Musings

I remember when Neal and I were in our long distance relationship, and he was visiting me in America how I would try to freeze every detail to recall for the future. This was especially true for his freckles. I remember times when we were having a lazy Sunday morning, or he had drifted for a nap, and I would study the freckles on his arm or back with such intensity. I tried to find patterns or a star constellation, anything that I could recall when we eventually separated again.

{Just so you know, I was never able to remember any of these details when we were apart. I also realize how crazy this sounds, and I’ve also never admitted this to Neal…so that’s one of the joys of being married to a blogger I guess?}

It’s been years since I thought about the intensity that I tried to hold on to each moment and memory like a perfect little sponge. And since we’ve been married and living in the UK together, sometimes I have stopped relishing the details and the little moments. Until a perfectly ordinary moment happened the otherย night that brought it all back to me.

I was curled up in bed watching 90 Day Fiancee, which follows engaged couples looking to relocate to the United States under the K1 visa. I find it incredibly interesting, and for me, so relatable. The couples are stressed under going the visa process, learning cultural differences while having family and friends watch from the sidelines. While I watched the show, I turned to my right to see Neal sleeping away. (I have to mention that Freddy was also snuggled up next to Neal, making it for a very cozy February evening.)

I then realized how wonderfully far we’ve come, and that I don’t have to worry about freckles or freezing a single moment in time for my memory. We have a million little everyday memories and moments right in front of us.

I do believe that when we were in the LDR, we were forced very much to live in the moment for each single day. That is a powerful (and potentially life changing habit) and I want to make sure I get back to the everyday awe. The Day One app is my virtual journal and tool, perfect for recounting moments (big and small) each day. It is becoming one of my favorite go to apps. I do want to make sure I am enjoying each day for the simple victories and wonderful laughter.

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