Greetings lovelies and welcome to another installment of Marriage Musings Monday, where I attempt to write about love, relationships and marriage all as a relative newlywed.
I saw this quote trolling through Pinterest (thank you very much) which got me thinking about the concept of expectations. We all have them, of ourselves and of our relationships with other people. With our families to best friends, expectations are set…but the idea of expectations couldn’t have come more to life than in romantic relationships, especially in marriage.
Entering marriage, after the fanfare of a big wedding day, it is tough to adjust your expectations to the day to day routine. This was especially difficult for Neal and I. Unlike many couples, we didn’t live together prior to the wedding since we were about 8,000 miles apart. Aren’t long distance relationships wonderful? (Curious how we met? Check out Our Love Story here.) Since we had a very different learning curve our first months of marriage has been all about adjusting pre-set expectations. (This is especially true for me.)
The problem for me was I was feed on a diet of romantic comedy movies sprinkled with plenty of Sex and the City. After watching those wonderfully unrealistic programs on repeat for years, you begin to believe that surprise flower deliveries, dancing in the rain and grand gestures are real life.
And then you apply those unrealisic visions and expectations to your real life. Ladies, I have learned that this isn’t a very good idea. It’s better to step back and welcome (with open arms) the relationship you are in, for what it is.
Instead of grand gestures, our marriage is filed with simple and sweet gestures. Like Neal accepting 99% of his meals as vegetarian, since I myself am a vegetarian. (Neal has sausages for breakfast on the weekends, but that’s all.) Or how Neal makes me breakfast each morning while I am struggling to curl my eye lashes and decide on what to wear. Or how I humor Neal’s love for random music so much so that there are little stacks of CD’s (all around the house) and I don’t say a word.
Ah… just a few musings from me this newlywed who has thrown out the perfect picture in my head and welcome something better: the love story right in front of m eyes.