Archive for the ‘Challenges’ Category

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Well, in an effort to keep my personal promises (both to myself and to the lovely blog readers out there) I have decided to post how I am doing in my 2012 “resolutions/goals“:

First, I have completed my first read of 2012 which was goal #1.  The title of this novel is The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern.  And from a scale of 1 to 10, it was easily a 8.5.  This book was filled with magic, imagination and plenty of mystery.  The author painted a rich tapestry of a divine world, that you never wanted to have end.  Simply stated, it was delicious… especially with all of the cold, wet winter outside my window.   If you are looking for a new read, I would 100% recommend this book!

My reading goal has been expedited by another goal: to keep on movin.  You see when I hit the gym, I love reading my Kindle.  It makes the time on the elliptical machine literally fly on by.   I am sticking to burning calories, getting in shape…with the overall goal of May 26th in the forefront of my mind.

As for the cupcakes, I am going to attempt a new recipe at some point this weekend…. I will be sure to keep you all posted on my success or failure.

On the eve of my 30th birthday, I write this blog post with mixed emotions.  I am leaving the decade of my twenties: Carefree with love and life, and with the various lessons to go along with all that those seemingly long ten years were.

I’d like to think that I am smarter, as I completed my college degree in my twenties.  I’d like to think that I am more worldly and aware of my surroundings, as I traveled to over thirty five countries during my twenties.  I’d like to think that I have a better grasp on my career path, but ironically I am still lost in my path for true professional fulfillment.  I’d like to think that I have learned mistakes to never repeat again, like speeding or burning pasta.  I’d like to think that I accomplished small life moments like reading a John Steinbeck novel or learning how to knit.

My twenties were comprised of a decade of me learning and growing and changing.  It wasn’t pretty (thank goodness Facebook wasn’t around when I turned 21) but through it all I became what I like to think as a well rounded, independent thinking woman who has a passion for beautiful shoes and an adventurous life.  I welcome my new decade with open arms as I walk toward the next phase of my life with a spring in my step.

Off to have some tea (yes you read that right… TEA).  This Seattle girl is getting converted into a tea drinker.

Seven short days and I will be picking my darling British gent up at the Spokane International Airport.  Seven days, I can do that.  From now until 3 pm next Thursday, I need to continue to live my life on a day-to-day basis while appreciating each moment, not wishing for 3pm on Thursday.

I guess, that is my tip for my fellow Long Distance Relationship folks out there: live your life.  That can be tough, but it’s critical.  I have had the chance to be invited to weddings the past few weeks, and without Neal I feel like I am missing my partner in crime.  But, should I miss out on that moment since he can’t be there? Of course not.  Life is a series of moments, that when strung together create incredible stories and memories.  Right now, being in a long distance relationship I can’t put my life on hold when Neal and I are not together.  That simply isn’t probable.

So, I will continue to enjoy life…living to the fullest.  Appreciating the time that Neal and I are together (geographically) and developing a sense of self and needed patience when we are apart.

It’s still Thursday in my timezone so I am still able to sneak in a LDR tip for the week!  This week, it’s all about a concept that  I have talked about over and over again: communication.

Communication is crucial!

I saw this quote and it made me smile beyond belief.  First, I love Shakespeare (which makes me sound like a academic geek) and I also appreciate the idea of clear and consistent communication.

With planning a wedding, managing a long distance relationship, prepping for a visa application process plus “normal” life like work, friends and family… stress can begin to get compounded fairly quickly.  That’s why Neal and I are constantly using technology and tools as part of our Long Distance Relationship maintenance program.  From Skype, Google Chat, telephone calls and all… daily communication with each other helps diffuse stress and tension.

We talk about our days (the highs and the lows) while trying to help keep spirits high and true levels of appreciation.

I like to think that if Romeo and Juliet had the tools that Neal and I have the star crossed lovers may had a happier ending.

This quote made me smile, and I thought it would be a fun way to start the first full week of September.  School is back in session ( I know as many of my friends are teachers who are encouraging children to be creative, thoughtful and caring individuals).  I vaguely remember going back to school with the ever present fear of fitting in.  I was always the kid who loved learning..no matter how geeky.  I was the one, who read for fun.  Who volunteered because it was the right thing, not the “cool” thing.  I was in drama, because I loved (and still do) to express myself creatively. There were moments that I just didn’t fit in with the norm of school.  I wish I had the quote below when I was in middle school and high school.  The idea of being okay, to be creative and bold and outgoing (or a fruit loop) in a world of cheerios.

Be true to yourself…. it is the only way to find true and utter happiness.

I also send a sincere thank you and good luck to all of my friends who are teaching this year.  You have the patience of saints and are doing an incredibly important job that is sometimes not valued the way it should.  Thank you for acknowledging the “fruit loop” kids in your classrooms, as I know you do, and for accepting them for just who they are.

Neal and I were on Google Video Chat last Sunday night, when he made a comment that really struck me as honest and true.  Neal said, “Only when I am traveling do I realize how far away we are.”

With all of the tools and technology that Neal and I have at our LDR fingertips, I thought it would be a good idea to make the #2 Survival tip about using all of your communication tools.  (Missed Tip #1 about Flexibility? That’s okay.  Check it out here.) For all of those in a long distance relationship, the tools to keep communication fluid and constant are ever present.

Skype: This is the biggie, and will always have a place in my heart.  (As this was the tool that Neal used to asked me to marry him.)  There are limitations to the free software, like the ability to group video chat.

Google Chat: This is the tool that Neal and I use to pass messages together throughout the day, or while I am lunch we will have conversations about wedding plans, upcoming trips and more. It’s great because all of the chats (unless you go off record) are recorded and searchable.

Google Video: Neal has a new tablet PC, so this is the tool that we have been using most frequently.  It’s simple, so tough to find flaws.

Google+ Hangout:  Neal and I have been able to test the Google+ hangout feature, which we both love.  Essentially, you can create a “hangout” space for a group of friends.  This is free, something you would have to pay with Skype. You can share/watch YouTube videos together so much fun.

Google Docs:  By now you have realized that Neal and I are pretty big fans of Google.  With that, it’s no surprise that we share information through Google Docs.  Lists of future travel plans to wedding details, all live there allowing us to both access it at any time of the day.

FourSquare:  Neal and I both play Foursquare pretty competitively.  We are constantly trying to beat one another’s points, mayorships or badges.  It sounds incredibly silly, but it’s a fun way to know what the other is up to… while keeping the competitive spirit alive.

Pogo: Speaking of competitive, Neal and I love to play Monopoly every chance we get making Pogo.com a perfect website for us.  It’s a free online gaming site that allows for us to both login and play a killer game of Monopoly.  We will typically have a video chat at the same time… that way the winner can properly gloat.

Texting: Texting internationally would normally cost a fortune but Neal downloaded an app that allows for him to send text messages (unlimited) to my American number.  It puts us right at one anothers fingertips (literally) at any moment.

Telephone Calls:  Neal has signed up for a cell phone plan and phone that allows him to make international calls to three pre-selected telephone numbers.  It costs about $15 per month, but it allows for us to chat when the internet isn’t accessible.

Letters/Cards:  I try to write a hand written letter or card to Neal on a weekly basis.  I tell him about my day, how much I miss him… or simply how much I love him.  (That’s what a love letter is all about, right?)

Whew.  Looking at all the tools and technology Neal and I use to communicate looks overwhelming and exhausting.  But not for us.  We’ve added these tools in order to be as flexible as we try to create as normal of a relationship for the two of us… even against 5,000 miles.

I hope these pieces of technology give any of you out there in a LDR some new ideas on how to communicate.  Did I miss one of your favorites?  I’d like to hear it, feel free to post a comment below!

From last week’s post on the Quote of the Week, I thought I would make it a theme here on the blog.  I am always needing a jump start as my weekend wraps up in preparation for my upcoming week.

This week I thought I would select a quote from a very smart man (a genius) actually, Albert Einstein.  There is something true to be said about constantly moving forward, towards the next goal… the next step…while finding balance.

My current life is finding the balance between work, a long distance love, wedding planning and figuring out the plan after May 2012. I hope this quote provides you with some inspiration to take on this week!

Image Credit: http://welovetypography.com/post/9336

I remember being a college student sitting in a Psych 101 class, learning all about classical conditioning, specifically Pavlovian reinforcement.  Essentially, Pavlov observed that his dogs began to react (AKA salivate) whenever they even saw the lab tech who fed them… food didn’t even need to be involved.  Now I am no Psych expert, in fact the class drove me crazy as a freshman… but funny enough I thought about that very lesson last night.

You see, I was returning from a business trip and I found myself at the Seattle-Tacoma International airport on my way back to Spokane.  As I pulled up into the airport, I began to get misty eyed.  Just being at an airport, even for an entirely different reason, caused the conditioned response of my tears.  You see airports now represent the travel time and distance Neal and I have between each other.  I was reminded of the number of flights in our future, and how long it would be until the shuffling through an airport isn’t a constant element of our relationship.

The constant aching didn’t stop until I landed in Spokane, and was able to talk to Neal on the phone.  Hearing his voice (and seeing his smile on Google Video Chat) brings forward a response that isn’t because of conditioning.  Just a sense of calm and happiness I’ve never known before.

Happy Tuesday evening everyone…

Since Neal and I got engaged last February, I have been asked the same question over and over again.  Actually, it’s been the same question that’s been asked since Neal and I started dating.   The question of course is, “How is that going to work?  Where are you going to live?  Here, there or somewhere in between?”

The idea of one of us moving internationally, across land and the Atlantic, isn’t as simple as it sounds.  When talking about visas, immigration or becoming an expat, you are dealing with a lot of factors that are out of our control.   The most obvious is rules and regulations that both of our home countries have when handing finance/spousal visas.    The hoops and loops are endless, which is important to be aware of prior to beginning applying for any visa (no matter who is moving).

In order to make a smart decision, Neal and I have begun to make the most important pro/con list of our life.  We have been looking at a variety of factors, from work to where we would live to what our day-to-day life would look and feel like.

There will never be a point in the process when there will not be a million different questions about the next phase of our life.  The one question that has not crossed my mind is, “Will it all be worth it?”  Because I know, without a doubt that it will.

For those who don’t know me, I am a planner.  For trips I come up with multiple agendas with back up plans in case of weather, time, personal preferences and more.  I hate wasting time, money or people being disappointed in a plan.  That is why I plan down to the last minute detail.

The past thirty six hours has been a test of my ability to quite literally roll with the punches and earn the fact that I call myself “flexible”.  Long story short, when Neal arrived into the US he was delayed by immigration causing him to miss his connection flight out of Philadelphia.  With a holiday weekend, flights were over sold causing no option expect staying the night in Philadelphia.  This morning he awoke bright and early (as in 2 am) to make it to the airport to fly standby on an earlier flight.  He found the airline (US Airways) lost his reservation, and he had no way to reach me in Spokane.  Neal was able to get to Phoenix and through the luck of the travel gods then placed on a flight to Seattle arriving at 4:30 pm. (When Neal was on the plane, they were asking for volunteers to give up their seats… we still don’t know how he got that seat.)  I made the drive in record time, arriving at the airport just after 5 pm.

Today was stressful for both of us.  We hated being apart, not being able to support one another and feeling completely helpless.   Today taught me that no matter how much I try to plan life down to the little details… it all doesn’t matter unless you can roll with the punches.

Tomorrow we set off for the coast of Washington for time together and celebrating the 4th of July.  Thank you to all my blog readers who sent good travel juju our way.  It worked!!